Busy week.. focusing on today :)

Hey :)
So this week is only just over halfway done but it almost feels like the end of it. I have been working every day apart from Wednesday, when I went to school, and I will be working until Saturday so not finished yet. But it has been a nice productive week. A week to be proud of.
I send out quite some internship applications, or am waiting for some contacts to send them to and been doing my best at work.
Being young and thinking about what I want to do as a job later seems pretty difficult for me. I am not completely sure yet what I want to do for the rest of my life. And sometimes it feels that i'm scared of the responsibility and pressure that comes with jobs. Don't take me wrong, I am sure I can handle it and do the job if I need too, however I don't know if I can be super happy at the same time.
Even when I am writing this now I can dream about being a writer for a living, but I do realize that i'm not that good of a writer at all. So many thoughts in my head that when I put them down or try to explain them to others it just seems like a chaotic mess.
The same goes for vlogging/ making youtube videos, dreaming about being able to do it for a living and just enjoy what i'm doing sounds as a great plan. But when I actually just focus on that it no longer is that fun anymore, because my subscribers don't grow or i don't get comments often. However, if I just think about the fun part of making the videos and watching them back later or just enjoying the fun at the moment, it is so much more enjoyable. Just like receiving one comment today on a video was like a great compliment and made me so happy, making somebody else enjoy what I like doing feels so much better than just doing something for the money or to become popular.
And that makes me think, do we maybe focus on the wrong things nowadays. Focus on the money, the goals, instead of the experience at that exact moment and what you like doing yourself. Because when you think about it... time goes so fast, maybe we should try and enjoy today instead of focusing on tomorrow and trying to remember yesterday.

See you next time
Xoxo Ezzie.